What an irony. My love life is beginning to resemble a revolving door of drama more than I really care for it to be. Just when you think you’ve struck gold, met the person who answers all those questions you never knew you had, something else has to happen to take it all away.Lesson learnt?
Don’t update these journals too often. Or I’d start sounding like a broken record.
For some reason, I just don’t seem to be able to hold down a relationship if my life depended on it. Maybe I’m looking in all the wrong places. Maybe I shouldn’t look (I am not! I wasn’t looking either!) I guess I’m not as cynical as I should be…I still believe in love at first sight and just KNOWING if a person is right for me. And it still happens enough (maybe I’m not so picky as I’m reputed to be and should be more!)
I don’t know. Without going into details, let’s just say I’m starting to tire of false starts. I just want to get on with this whole thing. I’ve shown up, I’ve told the truth, and I’m not trying to control the outcome. There’s something good in everything:
I got to know a wonderful man named Jim. For better or worse, I know that someone out there’s still got it in him to make me stop dead in my tracks. Someone with enough strength of personality and beauty of character to make me patient, work for stolen moments, wait. It was all in the smile, the confidence of the stare, and the handshake. I was hooked – bait, line and sinker. And man was I convinced he would be the one to go conquer the world with.
So who says Stuart’s an ice-queen? Someone here’s just melted his heart. But circumstances have precluded that a relationship is not possible. So be it. I will survive. Move on.
Hope you readers out there don’t get too confused. Just WHO is Stuart dating now? Hey, it’s enough to feed a small tabloid industry almost. I guess I deserve the reputation I have.
As Jim would say, “Whatever! Too much airtime. NEXT.”
(Ooh wee – another historical one. This is the first posting about Jim, and my last on Geocities…in fact, my last online journal posting of any kind until now. It’s been a long wait between then and now…and I’m very proud that Jim is still and always will be the man in my life. More about him if he lifts the gag order on me! – 5 Jan 2007)